The Joys of Pregnancy

 

...And the pregnancy goes on. The fainting at least has subsided, so there's a plus, but the promised energy boost after 12 weeks seems to have missed the bus... and it must be one of those old horse-drawn buses, since I am 19 weeks now and still can't bring up enough energy to walk more than 5 minutes. Which is exacerbated by the fact that I get breathless after walking only a few steps. And going up the stairs means usually that I choke at the end of it, despite several breaks in between the two flights up to my flat, and have to force a bit of water down my throat through the choking and the exhaustion tears, which so far seems to be the best way to get my breath back under control, well, after a while. Good thing is, my hubby is now on constant duty to carry my bag and coat up ahead of me, which makes it slightly easier to manage the stairs. I can only say that I'm glad that this part, where my bump is just a bit bigger, is now in winter where I have to wear all these thick clothes. Once the bump weighs a few more kilos I think we would need a crane to get me up those two floors, walking will be impossible!

Oh, and another joy I have discovered, excuse me for mentioning this, I know some people will frown upon such an indelicate subject, is the impressively varied farting, from painfully explosive to sly and unpleasantly odoured. It seems pretty everything I eat gives me wind, which has a knack of appearing at the most inappropriate moments. Seriously, my level of shame has been so much reduced by now due to helplessly having to endure unstoppable farts in public, I wonder if I will ever be allowed back into normal society... The alternative, keeping them in, is unthinkable. Tried it, and the pain makes me double over, sometimes even without me trying to keep it in but simply having wind trapped... Another thing nobody has ever mentioned to me before about the joys of pregnancy. 

The silver lining I keep reminding me of: all of this will go on the list, and when she is a teenager and annoyed like hell by her mum I will present her with all the things I had to endure to get her that far, see who wins the annoy-the-other contest!